Ok, so I think I may have just gotten a ticket this evening. Not sure, though. No, it wasn't a great invisible policeman that pulled me over or anything. (Too bad it wasn't Steven Seagal! Man, my husband would be jealous!) No, nothing like that...But, something about those flash bulbs going off behind me. I very seriously doubt that any Paparazzi would have any reason to be following ME...much less snapping pictures. Yep, it was either me or that Speed Demon who was behind me urging me to move faster down a road of which I am unfamiliar with the speed limit. Just as I figured out the speed limit...and that I was about 5 miles over it...those lovely flash bulbs went off behind me. Hmmmm..... Guess I'll find out if I receive a congenial "letter" from the great City of New Orleans. I have a feeling it won't be one telling me how much they enjoy having me grace their area with my presence. No...instead I imagine it will be some form of a gentle (yeah, right!) and not-so-subtle insistence upon paying a fine due them for disrespecting their rules. Of course, I can only hope it was really Speedy Gonzales who made the flash bulbs go off and got his license plate enshrined by the NOPD Paparazzi. Oh, well. Time will tell.
Makes me think a little...like I ever stop doing that! Just like I am admittedly guilty in this case of speeding (sooo much less than I used to speed, by the way!), and Mr. S. Gonzales is most definitely guilty...I may have to pay the price for this and I may not, though I really do deserve to. (I hope Mr. G. does and not me.) I deserve it because, as I said, I disrespected the rules and committed the (is this called a crime?) act of civil disobedience. (Oooh, that was good!) Additionally, no matter what I think, Mr. S. Demon (those demons....ugh!) may or may not have to pay the price for what I think he did wrong. Only the NOPD Traffic Camera will be the judge of that. Even if I do think he was wronger than me.
So, with all of that said, I am reminded so clearly of a much more serious and much more costly fine/debt owed for my innate wrongness, disobedience, and at times blatant lack of respect. I deserve to pay the ultimate and required price for at times spitting in the face of my God who loves me and made me to love Him. Sometimes my actions have been truly as harsh as spitting in His face, sometimes they don't seem so harsh as that. But, ultimately, all of those times I denied Him and what He did for me and avoided His call to my heart...that's exactly what I did...spit in the face of the One who loves me more than any human being can even begin to know how to love. How humbling and shocking and amazing and precious is it to know that He paid that costly fine...the debt that I owed, not Him...He paid it FOR me AND for YOU by dying on that cross. Such a gruesome, horrible, humiliating death. Yet, such a loving, triumphant death, as His blood that poured from His body covered me and all of my sin even then...long before I would do the things He knew I would do. He sees His blood covering me...not my wrongs and shameful ways. His AMAZING GRACE that is so incomprehensible has been offered to me and to you...no matter how far gone we think we are. No matter if we are as guilty as Mr. Speed Demon, or "just a little guilty" like me. It's FREE for us!!! AND, the even more awe-inspiring thing is that He not only died that horrible death for us...He victoriously, miraculously, triumphantly rose again...from the dead...spoke to His disciples (like our friend John) so that they would KNOW that He is Who He says He is and He can do what He says He can do and so that they could and would record their experiences with Him in order for us to be able to know Him through those words (His Word)...then, oh yes, it gets even better, He ascended (that means went up) into heaven to prepare a very special place for us to come and spend eternity with Him there. And I must say...that place sure is gonna be somethin'...He's been working on it for quite some time, and it's still not quite as perfect as He wants it to be for us. Because when it is...He's coming to get us and take us there to be with Him!
Wonder if He'll have Traffic Cameras on those Streets of Gold!?! Oh, who cares!
Oh, and don't forget about Mr. Speedy...remember I said only the Traffic Camera could be the ultimate judge of him in this case. Well, same goes for all of those people around us that we look down at and compare ourselves to thinking we're not as bad as them...only He will be the judge of them. We might be quite surprized to see how many of "them" will be with Him in Glory! No, He doesn't miss the things they (and we) do, like the Traffic Cameras can. BUT...He chose to send His Son to die so that He could offer that Amazing Gift of Grace (undeserved favor), Forgiveness, Mercy, Love, and Eternal Life to any and all who would receive it by believing in Him. I am so glad He doesn't listen to others' opinion about me...or better yet, my opinion about myself...He is The Judge...not me nor you.
You're not too far gone. You haven't crossed the non-existent "line". If you feel that tug at your heart...stop fighting it. Don't deny it any longer. That's Him gently, tenderly, lovingly calling you to give up the fight and admit that He is Who He says He is. It's okay. You don't have to explain to anybody why you had to keep up the struggle against Him and what you know in your heart to be true about Him. Even if you don't understand how it could be true, and you don't know how you can ever figure Him out much less explain Him to anyone else. Don't worry about that. Just trust Him. Believe in Him. Right NOW. Don't put it off. You never know what tomorrow will bring...or even the next few minutes. Relax...let go...let Him have all of your worries. He doesn't intend for you to bear all of that alone. Let Him BE your Strength and your Hope...most of all...let Him be your Lord and Saviour.